Though I am no where near the magnitude of great wisdom like other thinkers of our time, I have been pondering some major thoughts. Big girl thoughts. Things I, as a twenty-two year old, don't know if I am ready or am even capable of handling.

Why is it that only in our deepest times of need we call to God? Or even just in any time of need or despair for that matter. Watching as the world passes me by so quickly that the wind from the speed blows my hair in thousands of directions, and I kind of like it, I wonder, why do I do this? Why do I cry and cry and ask God to help me through this time of need. Jesus did it hours before he was nailed to the cross. He asked for God's help. I do try to pray everyday. And I try to not ask. In my day-to-day life I try not to ask. If you really know me, you know very well that I do not, or rarely so, ask for help. Anything from homework, to moving my bed to a different wall, or even financially, I do not ask for help. This is even to a fault at times. I have gotten myself into trouble not asking for help. But I have absolutely no problem asking God. I do not know for sure why this is so. Maybe because I have no idea how to trust anyone. No idea how to ask. No idea how to take help.

Honestly, I have no clue where I am going with this. However, within the last couple of weeks, I have had to take some major big girl steps. And yes, my birth certificate will verify that I am actually an adult, I am twenty-two in fact. Though, I am still a major kid and majorly immature at heart. Not to say I do not know when to be a grown-up though. I really do. But recently, I have really had to step it up. Scary thought for many, Meaghan having ACTUAL responsibility. Ha.

I guess what I am saying, is that I do not have to worry. And neither should anyone else. I will ask for help. God is there. God is always there. And I have no problem asking for his help. His guidance and His support. And luckily, He is kind enough to listen.